Put yourself in these shoes...

John and Sarah have been together for one year before John had to move away to Philly for work. Despite the distance, they’ve chosen to stay in a relationship with each other. For a while, their relationship continued as before, but Sarah began to feel a need for physical intimacy. Instead of being honest to John with how she felt, she decided to take matters into her own hands. Gradually, Sarah’s need for physical closeness has increased to the point where she started to turn to other people who could satisfy her desires. Although Sarah’s desire to fulfill her lack of physical intimacy was met, she felt immense guilt towards her relationship with John, knowing that she was cheating on him. Sarah begins to distance herself from her relationship with Jim, which ultimately leads to their break up.

It wasn’t that Sarah no longer wanted to be in a committed relationship with John, or that she no longer loved him. It was simply the lack of communication that caused the fallout of their relationship. Sarah had needs that she was too uncomfortable to share with John because she thought that there wasn’t anything that he could have done. However, if she had been honest with John about how she felt, this couple could have worked together to find ways to fulfill each other’s needs and desires. Instead of building up to a break up, this might have been the perfect chance to strengthen their relationship.